The Date Rape Drug

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TRIGGER WARNING// Sexual Assault

I feel sick at the thought of posting this article. This topic is quite a sensitive topic for me, and below I will go into detail of my own experiences. I’ve decided to write this article because the amount of times the date rape drug gets used and how often people get away with it is partly down to miseducation. After watching Michaela Coels ‘I May Destroy You’ series on BBC it highlighted to me just how passive rape and sexual assault is in life, for both men and women – so I wanted to speak out about one of my own experiences.

What is the Date Rape Drug?

According to WebMD , “Date-rape drugs are substances that make it easier for someone to rape or sexually assault another person. They include alcohol and some medications. The person who’s attacked might become confused, have trouble defending themselves, or not be able to remember what happened later. “Date rape” doesn’t always happen on a date. An attacker could be someone you just met or someone you’ve known for a while.”

An attacker can use several kinds of drugs or medications to overpower someone else or cause them to forget an incident. The most common date-rape drugs are: GHB (gamma-hydroxybutyric acid) also referred to as ‘liquid ecstasy’, rohypnol, and ketamine. Alcohol enhances the effects of these drugs. None of these drugs have a smell or taste, making them unidentifiable as such when you’re drinking. However, apparently rohypnol used to come as a white tablet that didn’t have a smell or taste, but drug companies now make it as a light green pill with a blue core. If someone puts it in a clear drink, the liquid turns blue. However, some generic pills may not have the blue dye and your drink may not be a clear liquid – so we aren’t 100% safe yet.

My Story

Date Rape Drug Testing Is Totally Unreliable

I’m sure we all know someone that has fallen victim to the date rape drug, be that yourself or someone else. I’ve encountered and experienced this twice myself, and it’s horrendous. You lose full control of any speech, and of your body. You can’t move at all, it’s like you’re completely paralysed but your brain is working. You’re still there, but you’re not. There’s one encounter where I was out drinking with my friends and I was certain I got drugged, although it only occurred to me a few days after when I told a family member about my experience and they pointed out “ that doesn’t sound like drink, that sounds like someone put something in your drink”. I went from being happily drunk to losing my vision, being sick for around thirty minutes until my friend found me, and then I couldn’t hold myself up or talk. She thought I was just drunk – everyone did – and that’s what makes these drugs so dangerous.

My second experience I’m not 100% sure, but the situation wasn’t consensual either way. I went out on a date, I had a few drinks – but I can handle my alcohol. The bars were closing, so I agreed to have a drink back at his hotel room but made it clear I would have to leave after the one drink because I had somewhere I needed to be in the morning. He kept telling me to drink my drink because I was chatting loads and I thought nothing of it. Then all of a sudden I’ve blacked out and he’s having sex with me? I’m not going into further detail but when I left – again – not until weeks later did I realise what had happened until someone said “that doesn’t sound right, are you… ok?” I shan’t go into any further detail.

I left the hotel room immediately afterwards and got into a taxi, freaked out by what had just happened, and then I just tried not to think about it. I could barely get up the stairs when I got home, I missed my alarm the next morning and the next day I felt exactly the same as I did the first time I got spiked. I had a huge hangover and felt completely out of sorts the next morning. Whether I got drugged with the same thing both times, is debatable – but that’s besides the point.

The date rape drug isn’t just used to rape people, some sick people in the world will do it simply for a laugh. The first time it happened to me I was just out drinking with my friend in the pubs, no men involved, so how my drink got drugged – I don’t know when, or where it happened – I just remember losing all sense of consciousness. When I was at the bar an old friend started chatting to me and my vision just went and I was asking “sorry, but who are you?” then they told me and I just remember feeling really confused and trying to get to the toilet ASAP to be sick, whilst I still could.

In the first instance I count myself lucky because I was with a friend and out in public, so I managed to get home safe without anything happening. The second instance I wasn’t so lucky. The date rape drug is incredibly real and is used a lot more than people like to admit. It’s not necessarily used by strangers all the time as people like to think, it’ll be used on dates, and by those you trust. As my nan always says, “if you ever have to leave your drink – just buy another one – it’s worth the cost.” But what if the guy you’re on a date with is at the bar buying your drink? You shouldn’t have to feel on edge and paranoid when you go on a date, or go out drinking just in case someone drugs you – because it shouldn’t be happening anyway. If they’re going to drug you, they’ll find a way to do it. Let’s stop blaming the victims and start punishing the perpetrators. The security in bars/ clubs and restaurants should be monitoring the bar area on CCTV anyway, why are they not on alert for suspect behaviour?

Don’t Gaslight Yourself!

The date rape drug is horrendous for so many reasons, and the fact that it has so many similar side effects as alcohol (just more enhanced) is one of the scariest things about it, as you question your own tolerance. Did I just drink too much and black out or did someone drug me? You’re always trying to justify things NOT happening instead of realising the reality and what actually happened. When you have time to think after the incident you soon realise that you aren’t being dramatic, however you still remain in two minds. For example, on my second instance – I didn’t want to sleep with this guy, I ALWAYS use condoms and because I’m not on contraceptive I’d never let anyone finish in me. Why did that happen? Not because I was ‘drunk’ – it was because I blacked out and was incapable of saying no, or even realising what was going on. Have I ever been that drunk? No. Stop gaslighting yourself.

Another one of the worst things about the date rape drug is because it has similar effects to alcohol, you often don’t realise until a few days later that you got drugged – so you can’t report it, and how are they ever going to find the person that drugged your drink if you were out drinking with friends? The police don’t care enough to investigate, so the people that are date raping people are constantly getting away with it. What they decide to do with you after the effects have taken their toll is often the unknown, or remains in a blurred memory but again – by the time you realise – it’s too late.

Look out for your friends, and if your ‘friend’ is someone that drugs people – REPORT THEM! There’s some truly despicable human beings on this planet that will do whatever they want regardless of the impact it may have on other people, purely because they know they will get away with it and won’t get caught.

What Can I Do to Help a Friend?

An overview of sexual offending in England and Wales revealed that, approximately 85,000 women and 12,000 men (aged 16 – 59) experience rape, attempted rape or sexual assault by penetration in England and Wales alone every year; that’s roughly 11 of the most serious sexual offences (of adults alone) every hour. Only around 15% of those who experience sexual violence report to the police, and approximately 90% of those who are raped know the perpetrator prior to the offence.

Therefore, when most sexual assaults take place they don’t get reported and it’s because of the obscene amount of evidence required after the event has taken place. You can’t wash yourself, you can’t brush your teeth, or change your clothes, you have to remain feeling dirty so they can take evidence. Evidence which most of the time proves to be ‘insufficient’.

Tell me, who is going to go straight to a police station after they’ve been assaulted to go and not be believed anyway? Date raping needs to be watched and monitored a lot more especially in public places because the people that do it are serial offenders as they know they won’t get caught after getting away with it so many times before.

If a friend opens up to you about an incident where they think, or know, they got drugged – don’t allow them to gaslight themselves and encourage them to report it as most people won’t – I didn’t. Listen to your friend and don’t use excuses like “maybe you just drank too much” or “you shouldn’t have gone back to his hotel room” because trust me – that does not help.

If you feel as though you’ve been sexually assaulted or raped, contact the National Rape Crisis Helpline: It is open between 12:00-14:30 and 19:00-21:30 every day of the year – call 0808 802 9999.

End the Sex Toy Stigma!

Besides the debate that sex toys have become normalized for women and not men, I disagree. I think sex toys are still extremely taboo in today’s society – regardless of gender – and there’s still a notion of opinion regarding sex toys being ‘dirty’, ‘weird’, and ‘sexually deviant’ when in solo use, or deemed ‘unecessary’ when regarding couples sex. This opinion needs to change.

Single and Want a Sex Toy? There’s No Shame in the Sex Toy Game!

It’s 2020, we’re currently a part of a global pandemic which makes it near enough impossible for singletons to start forming relationships of any kind really. So just why is there still judgement and a stigma around masturbating with a device for assisted pleasure? What difference does it really make whether you wank with your fingers or with a clit vibrator? Likewise for men, why is it ‘disgusting’ or ‘weird’ for them to have a fleshlight? That’s just the female equivalent of having a dildo. Why do people feel the need to buy sex toys? Because they feel fucking good!!

Obviously, judgment of the use of sex toys more often than not comes from individuals that don’t use sex toys. “Why should we use them ?” some people may ask. Because they not only help to get you off, and heighten your orgasms, but they also help you to explore your own sensuality too. Using a sex toy is a guaranteed good experience, because you’re in 100% control as to how your body reacts and what’s going on, unlike the ‘real’ thing.

The thought of not having sex for six months makes me want to jump off the face of the planet, but being single, having a sex toy decreases the need for seeking sexual pleasure in another person. The stress free way to orgasm.. Do it on your own! I mean a sex toy cant pull your hair, choke you and fuck you all at the same time so they’re not a perfect replacement as such, but a good one nontheless. And probably one of the best investments you’ll ever make in your life.

Granted, the experience of using toys is different for each individual. For example, some women might prefer vibes on their clit, whilst others prefer a dildo inside of them, or someone agreeing to use a blindfold, but not handcuffs – preferences vary. However with a plethora of options out there, it would be rude to not try before you decide to form a negative opinion.

For those in relationships, just what is it with people, but mainly men, and their insecurities not wanting their partners using sex toys full stop? Some find it somewhat demeaning to their masculinity and may manipulate their partners into thinking that by using sex toys they are seeking sexual pleasure elsewhere. If this is ever the case, tell them to get stuffed. Toys over boys!

Why Sex Toys Are Good for Your Relationship

BDSM heart, I love bdsm, Heart of BDSM accessories, vector illustration Stock Vector - 48071610 — Copyright : flyintospace

Some partners may feel insecure at the fact they feel as though they can’t pleasure their partner enough if they want to incorporate sex toys into their love life, however that is just not the case. Sex toys are more than just a bit of added fun. In fact women feel such a way about their partners knowing about their sex toys, a survey by the sex toy retailer TooTimid.com of over 1,413 women found out that 54 percent of them hide their sex toys from their partners.

This shows just how prevalent the taboo surrounding the sex toy stigma still is in today’s society. If you’re embarrassed or ashamed of your partner knowing about your masturbation habits, how is the stigma surrounding sex toys ever going to end? Women, especially, find it a lot harder to cum than men, using a toy just helps you to get there a little bit quicker.

Besides the popular myth that every woman can cum, and that women can cum at the click of a finger – that is simply not true. The female orgasm is a lot more complicated than that. Reciting from my article on The Female Orgasm and Squirting: the Truth s, 75% of women can’t cum from penetration alone. Being able to orgasm depends a lot on foreplay for a woman, and heavily on clitoral stimulation in order to achieve it. Toys can be a great addition to foreplay, and really add to the experience as a whole.

Introducing toys to the bedroom, doesn’t mean your sex is boring and needs ‘spicing up’ it can be for many reasons. Being blindfolded can greatly diminish insecurities for some, and a small vibrator may be the thing that helps your partner reach the big ‘O’. Plus, toys aren’t just for fun: they can also assist those that struggle with erectile dysfunction, which is incredibly common. In fact, 1 in 4 men under the age of 40 experience erectile dysfunction (ED) in their life, meaning they can’t stay hard enough to finish sexual intercourse, and bringing some toys into the game can be a way to pass that.

The Sex Toy Stigma Against Men

Sex Toys Erotic Love And Sex Doll Masturbation Rubber Handcuffs ... — Copyright : alexutemov

Over at our Instagram handle @shshithappens I did a poll to see who uses sex toys – a simple ‘yes’ or ‘no’ answer was required. Most of the yes’ were women meanwhile most of the no’s were males which begs the questions; if toxic masculinity is the reason, the lack of sex toys on the market for men, or if they simply are not interested?

Vice states a fair point in terms of sex toy marketing, “Women were affirmed by the ‘Rabbit’ episode in Sex and the City, while men who use sex toys have their entire identity questioned. These days, erotic devices are tastefully marketed to suburban moms on vanilla lifestyle websites”

For solo sex, fleshlights can be incredibly satisfying for men, and can feel really good on the penis when filled with lube as it has the suction feeling of a vagina or anus depending on your preference, and then the wet feeling too – which the lube adds. However, like mentioned previously there’s often an assumption that follows when a man owns a sex toy for solo masturbation such as a fleshlight.

But why? It’s literally the dildo equivalent. If a man buys, or wants a fleshlight, so what? Sex toys are a way of exploring your own sensuality in full control and seeing what gets you off. A fleshlight creates a similar experience to a vagina, but at the same time it’s such a different experience because you’re in full control of every single sensation on your penis – unlike a vagina which behaves a lot differently. The same concept but two different experiences – just like using a dildo vs an actual penis. Fleshlights nowadays have developed and are incredibly innovative, not all look like vagina’s – some look more like machines. Masturbating with your hand or with a toy is no different, bar the sensation. For more information on sex toys for men head over to my Sex Toys article.

T he Independent states, “The benefits of orgasm are huge for both physical and mental well-being, and recent research from Harvard Medical School has found that regular orgasms can reduce the risk of developing prostate cancer by 22 per cent, so anything that adds or enables an orgasm can only be a good thing.”

Overall, sex toys are nothing to be ashamed of. Whether you’re worried about your partner finding out, your dad finding your dildo or the postman seeing your non-discreet package… who gives a fuck? We all do it!

End the sex toy stigma!

Water Sports: Everything You Need to Know

‘Urolagnia’ was voted Britain’s 9th biggest sexual fetish

Urolagnia, otherwise known as water sports, is actually one of Britain’s biggest sexual fetishes. What are water sports you may wonder… aren’t they games you play in a pool? A pool of someone’s piss, yes. Water sports is the sexual engagement with urine, be that with your own or a partner’s. Like most fetishes, there are far more people who are interested in this sort of play than are willing to disclose it. The forbidden aspect of this fetish increases the excitement for all participants. Water sports go way beyond a golden shower. Bringing a whole new definition to a ‘wet dream’…Urolagnia, a.k.a. water sports or piss play, still remains an extremely taboo paraphilia in today’s society

What Are Water Sports?

U rban Dictionary defines water sports as, “Sexual activity in which urine is involved. The presence of urine is generally considered erotic for those indulging in the urine related activities.”

Water sports can mean peeing on your partner, in front of your partner, near your partner, in your partner, or having your partner pee on/near/in front/ inside of you. No hard and fast rules here, except that it definitely involves pee.

Water Sports are Much More Than a Golden Shower. Why Are People Into Water Sports?

Speaking to Cosmopolitan, Samantha Manewitz, a sex therapist who specialises in working with alt-sex and kink communities, states that, “There’s often a component of dominance and submission in the act of peeing on a partner, or having a partner pee on you. But for others, golden showers are just a fetish that gets them aroused and they don’t have any interest in the power exchange aspect of urinating in front of a partner.”

She goes on to further state other wants and desires for the need of urine in sex play and in her practice, she’s found that people are into piss play for a variety of reasons. “Water sports can foster trust and intimacy, there is vulnerability both in having a partner pee in your presence and allowing yourself to be peed on,” she continues, “There is also something about exchanging bodily fluids in general that can be hot for some. The fact that it is ‘wrong’ and ‘dirty’ can be a turn on in, and of itself.“

I think our relationship has evolved to the point where I can give ... — @someecards

In an article for Esquire, the writer states, “On a very basic level I like watching men hold their dicks in their hands. I also like the sheer quantity that you can get with urine – a physical impossibility with semen, unless you have some as-yet-undiscovered diet that means you can ejaculate with the volume of a post-pub-crawl toilet stop. And finally, it’s the expression on a guy’s face when he – the clue is in the name – ‘relieves himself.’ There are echoes of the satisfaction of a really good orgasm.”

Some people like to pee in public or semi-public, combining exhibitionism with peeing. ‘Pussing’ is a British term for a fetish that involves watching someone pee in a public or semi-public place.

Meanwhile, ‘Omorashi’ is a Japanese term to describe a fetish for having a bladder so full that you need to pee urgently, and getting sexually aroused by either feeling this sensation yourself, or getting sexually aroused by watching, and forcing someone to be in this position. Then there are the people who love to wet their panties ‘accidentally’ or to observe ‘accidents’.

Havelock Ellis was an English doctor who studied human sexuality in the early 20th century. He was one of the first to talk about this fetish and also to admit that he had this fetish. He thought the fetish had emerged from various incidents in his childhood and adolescence where he witnessed his mother urinating. Lots of people with urolagnia can trace their desire back to a time where they became aroused and urine was present.

There are more reasons – very rarely can you look at an individual kink and say “this is exactly why people like it” – different people will pick up on different details that turn them on. But when reading about water sports, lots of people mention enjoying the humiliation aspect. Others enjoy the smell or the taste, or the warm wetness. Contrary to popular myths, it isn’t particularly an unhygienic or dangerous thing either.

For many, it’s the sheer taboo of it that gets them off. Piss play is sexy for the same reason that BDSM is sexy: it’s considered naughty, dirty, even morally wrong, and for some that can be a major turn on.

The Facts & Stats

Last year during a nationwide study for Channel 4’s ‘Great British Sex Survey‘, urolagnia came in at number 9 in the UK’s top sexual fetishes. Stats on kinks – especially taboo kinks – are notoriously hard to gather, because there are many things lots of us enjoy that we’re unwilling to admit. Even still, the survey estimated that at least one million British people are into water sports – a figure that is still pretty high regardless.

In 2014, researchers at the University of Montreal set out to discover just how common certain sexual fantasies were in men and women. Around 3.5% of women reported fantasies about urinating on (or being urinated on) by a partner, and (like usual) the figures for men were higher: 8.9% wanted to wee on someone, 10% wanted to be weed on. When regarding sexual fantasies, male stats are often higher than a woman’s purely because of the taboo that forbids women talking about sex in general – so no doubt, the percentage is higher than 3.5% in reality.

There’s still plenty of water sports porn out there – a PornHub search for ‘piss’ turns up over 10,000 videos – but in general censors frown on anything that involves urine. Esquire states that, in fact, “The British Board of Film Classification in the UK won’t even allow female ejaculation in porn, because it is convinced that female ejaculate and ‘urine’ are one and the same thing. The proposed Digital Economy Bill, which is currently on-track to become UK law, would block websites which include acts like urination and female ejaculation.” They go on to bring to light, “Which does raise the rather interesting question: if a video did emerge of a public figure indulging in water sports with some sex workers, would anyone actually be allowed to publish it?”

How to Practice it Safely

Consent – consent is the most important part of any sexual engagement. Both parties need to fully consent to whatever act you’re going to do and both parties need to know they can stop the act at any point (for whatever reason). Opening up the conversation with, “Are you interested in experimenting with water sports?” is probably a best had before the foreplay kicks off, not in the heat of the moment.

Make a plan and stick to the plan – and then be sure you’re taking general cleanliness into account. Is this something you want to try out in the shower? In a bed? On the floor? Where is the urine going? Are you avoiding the face? Are you urinating in their mouth? Sticking to the set plan ensures all the conditions of consent are being met, and no one is surprised in a way they are utterly unprepared for.

Uberkinky states, “For those interested in golden showers and drinking urine, one has to wonder if it’s even safe. Remember, what goes in must come out, so any medication or supplement will be excreted in the urine. To reduce the risk of transmitting bacteria, it is good practice to start mid-stream rather than at the very beginning. This allows the urethra to be flushed out of any lingering bacteria in the event of a urinary tract infection.”

It’s handy knowledge not only in case you hook up with a fetishist, but also if you happen to get stranded in the desert. If drinking urine is good enough for Bear Grylls, and as long as they follow the general safety advice, it’s good enough for kinky people too.

Can I Get Any Infections Practicing Water Sports?

A healthy person’s urine is 95 percent water and is sterile, so drinking it in small amounts is not a problem. However, if the person has an infection, then this is not a great idea. Many people who practice water sports drink lots of water so the urine is dilute.

According to Indiana Public Media, “Urine is still safe to drink in the short term. Normally, urine is about 95 percent water and only five percent waste minerals such as excess potassium and calcium. So at least at first, drinking urine isn’t that different from drinking water.”

And for those worried if you can catch an STI through golden showers or drinking someone’s urine, BeSafeMeds states, “While we can test for gonorrhea and chlamydia by testing urine samples, there is no transmission of STDs through urine. So, while golden showers may sound gross and are not for everyone, the chance of getting an STD from a shower of urine is next to zero.”

EXPLAINED: The Spit Fetish

After reading through various disturbing articles about men with a saliva fetish requesting women on the street spit in jars, filming it, and later swallowing it and then (sometimes) getting arrested – I came to the realisation that the spit fetish is a lot different to a saliva fetish. The spit fetish is all about the dominant and submissive role partaken in BDSM whereas the saliva fetish is more about the messy and wet side of things I guess? Those sort of instances would be classed as more of a paraphilia, as the women getting involved don’t benefit off – consensually or non-consensually – doing the act. Defined by Encyclopedia, “Paraphilias are no longer understood as dysfunctional deviations from the normal, as the sexual perversions once were, but are now defined as behaviors centered on sexual arousal with objects or situations where affection may not be reciprocal or returned.” A saliva paraphilia is called Salirophilia.

The Spit? FetISH?! Is what you’re probably thinking right now. Yes, the spit fetish. It’s a part of the BDSM spectrum, branching off as one of the many fetishes amongst it. BDSM is an acronym for Bondage, Discipline, Sadism, and Masochism. But you may like spit more than you think, like everything on the BDSM spectrum – it has levels. Do you use a bit of spit to help lubrication with masturbation? Or to make the blowjob that bit more slippery? Then you probably have a bit of a spit fetish.

What Is a Spit Fetish?

What is a spit fetish? – When a person gets aroused by being spit on or spitting on someone else. The person spitting is usually the dominant and the person being spat on, the submissive.

Is a spit fetish the same as a saliva fetish? – No, although both are based on the same subject, a saliva fetishist gets off on the feel, look and sensation of the saliva on their skin. Someone with a spit fetish likes the humiliation aspect of being spit on or being the person doing the spitting.

Why Do People Like Involving Spit During Play?

The act of being spat in your mouth, or being spat on your face/ body is similar to the feeling of cum in a sense, which could also be another reason why someone desires to be spat on during intercourse.

As for the person doing the spitting, it can be a dominant thing – the commonly “you’re below me” attitude that is associated with spitting – a degradation and humiliation aspect. Also, the appearance of the spit crossed with make-up, making someone look a hot mess. Again, that’s a dominant thing. In addition, if the partner is tied up, with spit on their face falling down and they’re unable to do anything about it, it could also be a huge turn on because they are essentially solely relying on you and trusting you and devoting themselves regardless of what unnecessary disturbances may come in the way – like spit falling off your eyelash making you partially blind as you’re getting fucked, but it’s all good!

But jokes aside – don’t get spit in your partners eye as it will sting, go bloodshot, and could create room for infection. So… avoid the eyes!

Some History

The Urantia Book claims that (historically) saliva was a potent fetish. Apparently, “devils could be driven out by spitting on a person” and “for an elder or superior to spit on one was the highest compliment”. Furthermore, it could perhaps be argued that saliva plays a (direct or indirect) role in a lot sexual behaviour that raises the question of how “deviant” saliva fetishes actually are.

The Difference Between the Saliva & Spit Fetish

Many different bodily substances have formed the basis of paraphilic and/or fetishistic behaviour including urine (urophilia), faeces (coprophilia), blood (menophilia and clinical vampirism), and breast milk (lactophilia). However, one bodily fluid that has not really been the subject of scientific research is saliva in relation to saliva fetishes and spit fetishes. And there is actually a difference between the two.

The saliva fetishists don’t really appear to share much in common with spit fetishists, as that appears to be more a part of sadomasochistic sexual activity.

Those with a saliva fetish are turned on by qualities in the spit—it’s lubricating silkiness, its wetness, its scent, or whose mouth it comes from. They like to rub their hands, face, mouth, and genitals in the substance for the tactile sensations and the essence of the saliva donor.

Those with a spit fetish on the other hand have a different reason—they want to be spit on to be degraded or humiliated by the object of their affection. It’s still about receiving the essence, but the trigger of arousal is in the act of humiliation, not in the warm slimy feeling of the spit itself. This is often called spitting domination.

The Link to BDSM

If you have a desire to be spat on, this is usually associated with you seeking domination from the spitter/ having the need to be sexually humiliated – making the person being spat on, the submissive.

Most of the online literature focused on spitting fetishes (as opposed to saliva fetishes) appears to be rooted in BDSM and is usually referred to as ‘spitting domination’. The dominant partner may spit onto their submissive partner’s face and/or mouth.

If your kink involves aspects of humiliation and degradation, spitting can be the perfect addition to that kind of dynamic. There’s something about being spat on that really enhances the feelings of submission for a lot of people.

Many of the online articles about spitting fetishes see parallels between the act of spitting and the act of ejaculation – particularly in relation to ‘facials’ (i.e. the act of men ejaculating onto someone’s face) and the practice of bukkake (i.e. the act of several/many men simultaneously ejaculating onto someone’s face and/or body).

Compared to all other paraphilic and fetishistic behaviours concerning sexual arousal to human bodily fluids, there is significantly less written about saliva and spitting fetishes. Whether academic and/or clinical research is needed is – at present – debatable.

It’s also extremely important to negotiate this with a partner before you begin – like anything – as many people really won’t enjoy this kind of play. There is an obvious distinction between a spitting and saliva fetish which I hope has now been more brought to light. Spitting is related to BDSM and saliva is the context within the feel, texture and outright appearance of the saliva itself on your lovers body. Have fun, be consensual and play dirty and safe.

Shit Happens